Indiana Jones: Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)

In 1936, an archeologist named Indiana Jones is in South America attempting to recover (read: steal) a gold idol from an ancient temple. He maneuvers past a lot of booby traps, and succeeds in switching the idol for a bag of sand…or so he thinks. Because the bag is not the precise weight of the idol, it sets off a chain reaction which culminates in a now-famous boulder-chase scene.

Unfortunately, his jungle guide tricks him out of his hard-won idol, then takes off. Luckily, the guide gets skewered, and Jones once again retrieves the idol. He manages to make it out of the temple in relative safety only to run into dozens of angry natives. French archeologist (and Indy rival) Rene Belloq gathered the force of locals, then easily claims the idol as his own.

Back in the states, Dr. Jones is at his day job as an archeology professor when the U.S. Government charges him with recovering the Ark of the Covenant. Army intel has indicated that Nazis are digging frantically around Cairo, supposedly in search of the Ark. However, Indy knows something that the Nazis don’t: a key is required to reveal the exact location of the Ark. The key resides with the daughter of a former mentor (and former Indy flame). After a quick stop in Nepal to retrieve the key (as well as the tagalong daughter, Marion), Indy sets out for Africa.

Marion is kidnapped by the Nazis (who were also looking for the key), and it is obvious that they have recruited Rene Belloq to recover and harness the energy of the Ark. Indy makes it to the Ark first, but it is stolen “in trade” for Marion. The Nazis take the Ark to a controlled island to test its power, and Indy and Marion follow in an attempt to get it back. They are captured, but when Belloq releases the power, Indy and Marion are the only two spared from the lethal energy of the Ark.

This first movie in the Indiana Jones catalogue isn’t my favorite, but it IS #2 (I can’t help it, The Last Crusade is the best). Raiders is delightfully cheesy. Not so much that it takes a nosedive over the line into ridiculous, just enough to add some camp and throwback to 1930s Saturday matinee serials. Harrison Ford manages to upstage his fantastic performance in the original Star Wars trilogy. He IS Indiana, and there wouldn’t be an Indiana without him – no one would be able to pull it off. Not to mention, in a now iconic moment, Indy watches an expert swordsman strut his stuff, then simply shoots him. Harrison Ford was sick that day, and simply said to Spielberg, “I’m too tired to do the scene, can’t he just shoot him?” OK, that may not have been the exact quote, but you get my drift. Harrison Ford, even when deathly ill (also not fact-checked), is still 100% badass.

The film won five Oscars, and was nominated for four more. For what could be considered an action flick, that’s pretty impressive – even by today’s standards. Although the Best Original Score winner that year did turn out a very accomplished and memorable score, I believe that John Williams was robbed. Chariots of Fire is classic, but there’s something about the full-bodied orchestral masterpiece from the genius of Williams that elevates it past Chariots in my mind.

The only thing that I hate about Raiders is the end. “Don’t look”? SERIOUSLY?! That’s how you survive a power burst from God? Horrible. Literally the only thing that I can’t stand about an otherwise awesome adventure. This is the thing that demotes it down to an 8 out of 10.

Composers LIVE!

I just had to share this! It’s a video of Hans Zimmer and James Newton-Howard performing part of The Dark Knight‘s score LIVE at the IMAX premiere – why haven’t I seen this before?!

In case it won’t play on my site, here’s the link.

Apocalypse Now (1979)

In the midst of the horror of the Vietnam War, a Colonel and Green Beret is feared to have gone rogue (and quite insane). Thus, Captain Willard is dispatched into the Heart of Darkness on a mission that “does not exist nor will it ever exist.” He’s ordered to “terminate [the Colonel] with extreme prejudice.” He is sent up the Nung River on a U.S. Navy patrol boat to meet up with Lt. Colonel Kilgore, head of a U.S. Army helicopter cavalry group. After attacking a heavily fortified Vietnamese stronghold, Willard continues up the Nung.

As the journey proceeds, Willard becomes more and more obsessed with Colonel Kurtz (the one believed to have gone mad). At last, the boat reaches the last U.S. Army outpost – the Do Long Bridge. A couple of tragic deaths, explosions and exposition (especially in Redux) later, what remains of Willard’s team arrives at Kurtz’s camp, where Willard is captured.

Finally brought before the man he’s begun to think of as a legend, Willard listens as Kurtz delivers a lecture on war, humanity and civilization. Eventually, Willard kills Kurtz, and although he has the option of taking up Kurtz’s mantle, he retrieves the last soldier sent to kill Kurtz, and boards the boat to head back from whence he came.

The film is loosely based on Joseph Conrad’s 1902 novel Heart of Darkness, as well as Homer’s Odyssey.  The line “The horror…the horror” uttered by Kurtz as he dies is straight from Heart of Darkness. The novel did have to be retrofitted to match up with the specific horrors of the Vietnam War, but the general feel and themes of the novel are in tact. The focus on the journey was the part inspired by the Odyssey.

Despite leaving out hundreds of details in the above description, that’s all I have to say to explain the film – other than the fact that I vehemently dislike it. It’s really difficult to pinpoint what bothers me so much about this movie – especially because there are so many things I DO like about the film.

If you know me at all, you know that I love movie music. Normally, my obsessive focus alights on score alone. While the score is fitting, it is not the genesis of my complimentary attitude – the praise falls on the source music. From the use of The Doors’ “The End” to both open and close the film, to the iconic helicopter scene backed by Wagner’s “Ride of the Valkyries,” the source music is the true star of Apocalypse Now.

The other good thing about the film is the classic quotes. The best are:

Kurtz: “You have a right to kill me. You have a right to do that…but you have no right to judge me.”

Hubert de Marais: “…you Americans…you are fighting for the biggest nothing in history!”

Kilgore: “Charlie don’t surf!”

Photojournalist: “The man is clear in his mind, but his soul is mad.”

Kilgore: “I love the smell of napalm in the morning!”

Other than some quotable quotes, and some bitchin’ music, I felt like Willard while watching this one – stuck in my own personal brand of hell. If you LOVE war movies, Vietnam, crazy people and films that age you 50 years with one viewing, this one’s for you! Everyone else – watch the helicopter scene, then Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season Four, Episode 22 for Xander’s weird dream, and you’re good.

However, Hearts of Darkness: A Filmmaker’s Apocalypse is worth it. It’s a documentary that chronicles the trials and tribulations associated with the making of Apocalypse Now. An interesting tidbit is that some of the footage and sound was actually secretly recorded by Francis Ford Coppola’s wife, Elanor.

SO, in sum, watch Hearts of Darkness, the helicopter scene, and the episode of Buffy instead of wasting away through Apocalypse Now.

Tatooine

I know I haven’t posted in a corn-million years. Chalk it up to complete laziness. I’m planning on coming back with some posts in the near future, but don’t say that I didn’t warn you in the “About Me” that it’d be a good long while before this project reaches even the 1/4 way point!

All that said, I thought it’d be nice to placate you with something I saw on Dooce earlier today. It’s the original (only) Star Wars Trilogy done entirely out of paper, in less than three minutes, while the song Tatooine plays in the background. It’s lovely and amazing. Enjoy.

The MTV “Movie Awards”

If you’ve had any inkling of my blog in the past months, you know that I abhor awards shows.

For the most part, they are simply a way of catering to one movie per year (I’m looking at you The Hurt Locker and Slumdog Millionaire!), without recognizing actual excellence.

Now, in the past, I’ll admit that I’ve found the MTV Movie Awards at least worth viewing, if not worth praising the choices of victors. No more.

I happened to catch the latest awards show after a shift of volunteering at the Seattle International Film Festival. Let me tell you, the experience was more than sobering.

The fact that The Twilight Saga: New Moon took home five (that’s right, I said FIVE) of the twelve Moon Men made me reconsider my faith in humanity. To understand my position fully, let us consider the competition in each category:

Global Superstar (a category I don’t really care to understand…):
Nominees:
Robert Pattinson
Johnny Depp
Taylor Lautner
Daniel Radcliffe
Kristen Stewart

SERIOUSLY, tweens?! Is this entire generation on the CRACK?! Johnny Depp, people! Or, at the very least, a good actor – Daniel Radcliffe! More than just upset about this one!

I don’t really mind that much about “Biggest Badass Star” or “Best Scared-As-Shit Performance,”  but I will say this: I totally appreciated Amanda Seyfried in Jennifer’s Body and think it was an awesome win (Best SaSP)!

Best WTF Moment should have gone to Bill Murray or Betty White, but what does this generation know about funny?! Pretty much nothing, but I have to commend Ken on his acceptance speech, because for someone who is supposedly heartless, and always naked, he spoke mostly of his amazing wife who is a breast cancer survivor. For that, and for her, I tip my hat and say, “Well done!”

Best Fight. Whew. You people really suck. I fear for my future if you imbeciles are willing to amass enough votes to crown Obsessed as ANY kind of winner. Let’s all take a moment to cheer for domestic violence. Because, that’s essentially what just won. Personally, I think it should have been Sherlock Holmes (and not just because it was OUT OF THIS WORLD AWESOME, it was well-executed as well).

Best Kiss is difficult, mostly because I just want anything that’s not in any way associated with the Twilight to take the win. That means my vote goes to either Avatar or The Proposal. Think The Proposal should have gotten it, but I’m no tween.

I can’t wax poetic about Comedic Performance, but I can say this: it should have gone to SOMEone from The Proposal. Funnier. Than. The. Hangover. I said it. Now, suck it!

While I couldn’t be happier about the villain coming from Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, I couldn’t help feeling that most of the MTV audience hadn’t really seen Christoph Waltz, or Inglourious Basterds in general. Maybe it’s a bit too old for those who voted, but seriously, he was the real winner. I may hate the Academy Awards, but they had that one right!

Breakthrough Performance was a hard one, I’ll admit, but I hope that everyone voted for Anna Kendrick’s performance because of her Up In The Air triumph, and NOT because she’s in the Twilight movies. She really did kill that role, and I hope THAT was the merit upon which she was voted the winner.

Best Female and Best Male Performance. Wow. If ever there was a reason for me to stop watching MTV, this would be it (if I, indeed, still watched it regularly – which I don’t). I’m officially breaking up with MTV. Stewart. REALLY?! Over everyone else in that category?! I don’t think so. She’s wooden at best, and EVERY. SINGLE. PERSON. in that category delivered a better performance. I know you love the series, but let’s vote based on talent next time, ok? Male performance? You think he’s cute, and OMG, he took his shirt off!! Get real. Daniel, Channing and Zac out-acted him in this case. I’m sorry that you confuse him with the “actual” Edward, but it wasn’t a winning performance.

Best Movie just affirms that the youth of America could possibly screw things up worse than the rest of us have. The Twilight Saga: New Moon for absolute serious?! I almost thought it was a joke. Avatar was a movie GAME-CHANGER, people! New technology, and 3-D that completely BLEW. MY. MIND. Aside from that, it was still a better movie than New Moon. Sorry, Twihards. It’s the age of Avatar and we’re just living in it.

However, I will say this, @peterfacinelli accepting the award was kind of cute. He has just the ring of authority and humility that made it adorable, as opposed to ridiculous or over-the-top.

Consider this my letter of resignation, MTV generation. I have officially outgrown you.

A Fish Called Wanda (1988)

George and Wanda are a couple of wanna-be villians who plan a robbery. Things go south from the get-go, when Wanda’s other man shows up to help with the robbery, and George gets picked up. He is the only one that knows the location of the stolen items, so Wanda and her actual boyfriend (Otto) team up to get the info from George’s assistant, Ken, or from George himself.

George’s lawyer Archie becomes a target for Wanda’s feminine influence, while Otto sets out to work on Ken. Ken is distressed because he is occupied with “taking care of” the only person to witness the crime.

Otto, played erratically by Kevin Kline, is a complete psychopath. On the one hand, he’s an excellent liar and makes for a smart accomplice. On the other hand, he’s off his rocker. He ties Ken to a chair, then systematically eats all of Ken’s fish (including the eponymous Wanda) in order to get Ken to spill his secrets.

However, Otto is a hot and cold, awesome and lame character. When he pretends to be into Ken in that way, I was dying (with laughter). When he sniffs his armpits constantly, I wanted TO DIE (from the shame of it). Was he the pre-cursor to Mary Katherine Gallagher? An honor, I’m sure.

Wanda isn’t a great character. When she pretended to be a law student who was just a big fan of Archie’s, and wanted his autograph, I felt physically ill and had to pause. When she says that she’s not ready to go all the way with Archie (when they are practically to the point of dry humping) because she’s thirsty, I almost threw something at the screen. Bad, Jamie Lee, just bad. John Cleese’s Archie is funny some of the time, but I really dislike the fact that *SPOILER ALERT* he ends up with Jamie Lee Curtis’s Wanda. To be fair, I just hate Wanda. Not Archie.

In the end, Michael Palin’s Ken is my favorite character. His attempts to “wack” the eyewitness are (and I cannot emphasize this enough) HYSTERICAL because he manages to kill all of her dogs first. And in really ridiculous ways. Then he gets steamrolled. Fitting. And funny.

1001 Movies says that the film offered a “triumphant reappraisal” of Jamie Lee, “a launch pad” for Kline, and “elevated the careers” of Palin and Cleese. No, no and no. Everyone knows that Jamie Lee did horror well. She’s not the greatest comedic actress. She’s not. As for launching Kline, I don’t know how much his career really needed at that point. At least not from this film. As for the Monty Python boys, their careers were doing just fine! They’re from Monty Python! Even together in my favorite sketch (Ministry of Silly Walks)! They need no help.

People have suggested that I see this film for years, probably because of my love for the Flying Circus. I didn’t like it. I didn’t think it was as funny as most people, and I’m almost appalled that Kline got an OSCAR nomination for it. Further evidence that there’s something rotten in the state of Denmark, er, the Academy. Still love my Python boys, though. Enjoy their Silly Walks:

Rear Window (1954)

L.B. “Jeff” Jeffries leads an exciting life as a photojournalist. He gets into the war zones, and puts himself into the middle of whatever drama happens to unfold before his lens. However, he’s removed from the game after suffering a broken leg. Six weeks of nothing but lounging around his New York apartment while only seeing his caretaker and his girlfriend.

Jeff makes it past the half-way point of his confinement with flying (yet grumpy) colors. His girlfriend is a model/socialite who wants nothing more than to marry him, but aside from her less-than-subtle hints, she’s genuinely entertaining. His gruff, professional caretaker takes his moods in stride, and it’s easy to see that they’ve developed a friendship of sorts.

In an age before television addiction or the Internet, Jeff spends most of his days looking out his window. He sees many little dramas play out – a dancer rehearsing, a pianist composing, an artist sculpting – and his first weeks pass in this benign manner. Nearing the end of his captivity, he notices suspicious behavior that he believes adds up to a murder.

He engages his girlfriend and his caretaker in the plot to prove his neighbor’s guilt, and ends up dragging them into a dangerous situation. All’s well that ends well, and luckily for Jeff, it ends well.

After watching 12 Angry Men, I have a new respect for great writing and well-delivered exposition. Jimmy Stewart is entirely engaging as Jeff, yet my favorite character by far was Stella (played expertly by Thelma Ritter). She had wit and wisdom mixed with an efficient attitude that made me long for an awesome caretaker. Grace Kelly (in what I learned was one of her last roles before retiring from the business) as Jeff’s girlfriend, Lisa, portrayed a calm elegance that sometimes seemingly bordered on naïvety. You can almost see her grow up throughout the film, and by the end, she’s exactly what Jeff needs.

Rear Window is one of those seminal classics that everyone should see at least once. It’s been parodied and remade, yet stands up to its successors. Having seen it parodied on That 70s Show, and remade into Disturbia before seeing the film, I have to say that I was surprised with how much I liked it. It never really felt like a thriller or suspense, but I was deeply immersed in Jeff’s World from start to finish.

Two more things.

One – the guy playing the murderous neighbor in Disturbia (David Morse) looks ALARMINGLY similar to the one playing him in Rear Window (Raymond Burr).

Two – Stella had an amazing line that I feel still has resonance (and even more relevance) today: “We’ve become a race of peeping toms. What people ought to do is get outside their own house and look in for a change.”

And The Winners Are…

Ok, ok. I’ve certainly made my hatred for the Academy Awards clear. And yet, I find myself paying attention to them every year. Although I don’t consistently watch them annually, I always make sure to find out who won in every single category. That said, here’s the link to the list of winners:

http://oscar.go.com/oscar-night/winners?cid=10_oscars_gridLayout_hot

The ones that took me by surprise? As follows:

Best Picture: The Hurt Locker Say what you will, but I very seriously thought that Avatar would take this one. I was almost certain director would go to Bigelow, but that Avatar would get Best Pic. I really liked The Hurt Locker, however, Avatar has really set the bar, and filmmaking will never be the same. Surely that should be worth the statue. But, if Mo’Nique’s acceptance speech taught us anything, it was that Hollywood is all about the politics, not necessarily all about the factors that should go into selection.

Documentary Feature: The Cove I don’t know if it counts as surprise, but I really wanted Food, Inc. to take this one. From everything I’ve heard about The Cove, it was probably deserved. I don’t know if my heart can take actually watching it, though.

Foreign Language Film: The Secret in Their Eyes (El Secreto de Sus Ojos) from Argentina. Again, I don’t know if it counts as surprise, considering I didn’t see a SINGLE film in this category, and have no room to judge. I had heard a lot about The White Ribbon (Das Weisse Band), and expected it to go FTW. I guess I’m still pissed that Sweden didn’t submit Let The Right One In last year. It would have won, and totally deserved to have won. Grrrr.

Editing, Sound Editing/Mixing: The Hurt Locker I very seriously thought that Avatar would take all the technical categories. But, Hurt Locker was this year’s darling, and it seems like the Academy is pissed that Titanic took home so many gold men, and was taking it out on Avatar. I really do think that Editing should have gone to Avatar, so that James Cameron himself could walk out with at least one statue for his stunning achievement.

Happy about:

Directing: Kathryn Bigelow for The Hurt Locker There was only the slightest of chances that Bigelow wouldn’t walk away with this one, but it’s still great to see it happen. Although I do agree with some of my crazy movie bloggers that Cameron was probably more deserving considering the sheer magnitude of his project, and how he had to direct every. little. thing. That small part of my brain is overruled when I consider Bigelow’s subject matter, her cast and her unwillingness to cow to demands that the film be altered in any way. Also, I wrote part of my thesis on the modern gentleman’s club (the Best Director category), and it’s great to see her welcomed into the brotherhood to begin a new era. Brava, good woman, brava.

Animated Feature Film: Up I don’t know why, but I was afraid at the last minute that the award would go to Fantastic Mr. Fox because people love Wes Anderson (and Roald Dahl – I’m one of the Dahl fiends myself), or to The Princess and the Frog because it was a pretty big hit. All’s well, though, because the most deserving film won.

Makeup: Star Trek It was one of the best movies of 2009, so I’m glad it got some kind of recognition here. Considering the other films in the category, I was EXTREMELY glad Star Trek took this one. Huzzah for Sci-Fi!

Music (Original Score): Up by Michael Giacchino He’s had a pretty spectacular year IMHO. Personally, I like Star Trek better, but Up deserved the win. For a really stacked category, full of rightful contenders, it means more than a little to take home the trophy. As they said in Bring It On, being the best means going up against the best, and winning. Giacchino certainly did, and certainly deserved it.

Art Direction, Cinematography, Visual Effects: Avatar Not that anyone is particularly surprised by this, but these were of the most deserved awards of the evening. Since this is the most visually stunning film of all time, after all. It may have been robbed in other categories, but there was no doubt about these three, and I’m happy about it. Although, Sigourney Weaver sounded smug as hell when she announced Avatar. She made it sound like she was saying, “Duh!” and that was more than a little crass.

Pissed about:

Writing (Original Screenplay): The Hurt Locker Ok, we get it – you’re the little movie that could this year. Give it a rest already. Everyone knows that the most deserving film in this category was Inglourious Basterds. Hands down. I’m completely shocked that I don’t have more to be pissed off about this year, but this is the only one that really stuck in my craw. Mr. Tarantino, we don’t always see eye-to-eye, but I truly believe that you were robbed this year. Basterds was the most well-written script of the last few years, let alone 2009. Shame on you, Academy. SHAME. ON. YOU.

I’ll leave off the post by saying that the Oscars were fairly boring, and mostly predictable this year. Great job with the “no thank yous” rule, Academy. How’d that one work out for you?

There were a few gems, however:

Score music getting a segment! Dancing! Long section just dedicated to hearing the music – waaaaay better than sitting through the entire song for the other music category. See Adam Shankman‘s influence here and AM GRATEFUL. LOVED IT!

The fact that they pretty much had to throw in the Best Picture category because time was up – I almost missed it!

Stanley Tucci‘s speech about Meryl Streep. Just enough solid jokes, enough love. Great job.

Tim Robbins‘s speech about Morgan Freeman. Again, good, solid jokes, but some true and wonderful accolades as well.

Gerard Butler and Bradley Cooper. Onstage. AT. THE. SAME. TIME. Thank you, Oscars!

Morgan Freeman narrating what constitutes good sound editing and mixing. I never knew, so thanks for that, and thanks for getting Morgan Freeman. Could listen to him ALL DAY!

The horror montage. Yay for the montage! MAJOR problem though – Kristen Stewart and Taylor Lautner announced it. The producers actually included New Moon. FAIL. I can’t really see Beetlejuice, Dracula: Dead and Loving It or Young Frankenstein belonging in that category, either.

The fact that Sandra Bullock won a Razzie the night before she won her Oscar. Great year, Sandy! Oh, and she’s classy as heck because she graciously accepted her Razzie. America loves you!

Speaking of the Razzies:

I’m not going to go into it, except to say a couple of things – I didn’t really think that Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen was THAT horrible. It did have its moments, but there were other movies that were CERTAINLY worse. Yes, All About Steve WAS that horrible. Congrats to Eddie Murphy and Paris Hilton – Worst Actor/Actress of the Decade. Stunning achievement. Oh, and HUZZAH to Jonas Bros. taking Worst Actor. Well deserved. Here’s a link to the list of Golden Raspberry Award winners.

Shut Up! He Loves Me! (Sorry Twihards…)

Here are a couple of funny things I’ve come across recently while perusing the Internet for random tidbits of hilarity. As the creator of Down for the Count says, “A note to anyone who is offended by this: Develop better taste in books and movies.” I say – like the movies and books all you want, but laugh out loud to the genius below.

Down for the Count

12 Angry Men (1957)

Originally a teleplay broadcast live on CBS in 1954, 12 Angry Men made it to the big screen courtesy of Henry Fonda (who also plays the most influential role). Fonda convinced director Sidney Lumet to move from television to the big screen, and produced the film himself.

The story begins in a courtroom with a judge instructing the jury on procedure, then dismissing them to deliberate. The “12 angry men” from the title are the men that comprise the jury. An 18-year-old boy is on trial for the murder of his father. The case is suspiciously open-and-shut, so when the foreman calls for a vote, 11 of the jurors immediately go with “guilty.”

The one hold-out is a remarkably eloquent, rational Henry Fonda (known in the movie as #8). He doesn’t say that he thinks the defendant is innocent, but just wants to talk out the situation because he was not convinced beyond a reasonable doubt of the boy’s guilt. He makes it a point to focus on the bits of evidence that don’t add up, and manages to turn one person to his side.

This turnover sways a few more jurors to go through all the facts again. When everything is reconsidered, a couple more jurors reassess their verdict. Each time a member of the jury switches to “not guilty,” they seem to remember something, or later on come up with a new theory or recognize a new piece of evidence that helps convince other people.

Going into the film from the description, I wasn’t sure that I’d like it. What’s so interesting about 12 guys arguing in a room for an hour and a half? Of course it’s the hottest day of the year, as well. It does get melodramatic at times, and you certainly come to hate a couple of the jurors, but it’s a surprisingly good film.

There are a few good shots where the guys look directly into the camera – it’s entirely disquieting, but fittingly intense. Except when juror #9 does it. He uses a creepy voice and has a crazy look in his eye. I was put off my dinner.

For a movie that depends entirely on exposition, was shot in under 20 days, follows 12 talented actors, and definitely goes over-the-top, it manages to convey just as much (if not more) than some of today’s overly computer-generated films – just by using interesting angles and real human drama. Serious topics like discrimination, prejudice and the American justice system are given their due.

As 1001 Movies states, Fonda’s character makes everyone want to become a champion of the people and of justice. I know I want to be the level-headed person that convinces everyone of my brilliance simply by insisting upon due diligence.

Tiny bit of trivia: All but three minutes of the film was shot inside the sixteen-by-twenty foot jury room.